my whole life i've been empathic. extremely so. almost to a fault at times. many have told me that sometimes when i look into their eyes they feel as though i can see things deep inside them, things that they are not saying, things they have kept hidden from most. some have told me that the first time they felt it that it made them shiver, sometimes shudder. i rarely offer a confirmation or elaboration on what the professors of this feeling are describing. while i cannot deny completely the feeling that they sense, it is not quite as they suspect. i do not see images, i do not hear voices - i am not a clairvoyant in disguise. i am not extracting their deepest darkest secrets. its different than that. what they sense is more like an inhalation of emotion. a simple transfer that lasts only a split second.
but for you tonight, as someone who recognized this feeling again recently, i will offer the rare confirmation and elaboration: behind your eyes, i do see your pain. i've seen it before; never this present, never this raw, but i have caught a glimpse of it once or twice in our continuum. then, it was only during deeper, more intense gazes and mostly took me by surprise as i was not aware of the cause of its existence. this time, however, it is expected and this time i understand it. this time when i see it i feel it more strongly than i have ever felt it. this time with just one shallow glance, something much thicker than ever before washes over me slowly and yet suddenly at the same time. what i can't help but wonder - no, what i can't help but hope - is that during that moment of transfer, that moment of inhalation, you are granted a moment of reprieve from your pain. a moment when your ache doesn't necessarily disappear (as i cannot do that for you - not in this situation, not in any situation), but gently lifts itself ever so slightly, allowing you to breathe a little more freely and deeply for that one moment.
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