10 years later

This last weekend, I reluctantly made my way down South to Portland to attend my 10 year high school reunion (okay, so maybe reluctantly isn't necessarily the right word; I may or may not have complained to Katy for about 6 months prior to the event, hoping she'd tell me we didn't have to go). It wasn't that I didn't like high school; I did. I really did. I just have little tolerance for bullshit and I got in my mind that it would all be bullshit - all of these people (including me) trying to prove that we'd done something with ourselves when really no one has had enough time to do a damn thing. 10 years is not that long! However, as much as I hated to admit it (especially to Katy as she would have every right to say "I told you so"), I had a really good time.

And, so I have decided to devote this week's entry to THE 10 THINGS THAT WOULD NOT HAVE HAPPENED 10 YEARS AGO.

1. I would not have been deemed the public transportation expert on the bus and train on my way down (apparently I looked like I was seasoned in area as at least 6 people stopped me to ask questions and/or proceeded to follow me); no, that would not have happened - after all I grew up in disgustingly boring white middle class suburbia where public transportation meant a yellow school bus going to a school in the aforementioned category.

2. Taken shots and proceeded to get hammered with half the people that shared/encouraged my intoxication that night; in fact, given that I was only 18 years old and didn't start [really] drinking until I was 21, I wouldn't have done that with anyone.

3. Taken a full day to recover from an all nighter and the above said intoxication; how is it that teenagers have the phenomenal ability to sleep all day and night and yet also be able to stay up all day and night? I can no longer do either.

4. Needed to look at name tags of my classmates; proudly, Katy and I knew the names of every kid in our class on graduation day (yes we tested ourselves with a year book).

5. Been described as "fucking hot" by someone I didn't know (or at least had a hard time remembering exactly how I knew them); "you have such a pretty face" or something equally as patronizing would have been more like it.

6. Discussed "losing it" with those that I did; no, wouldn't have discussed that, because happily there was nothing to discuss on that subject back then.

7. Considered our old neighborhood so small; I swear the walk from home to the bus stop was fucking long back then (yeah, it was 3 houses away).

8. Missed my parents so, so badly; I was always close to them growing up (and in ways still am), but I would never have imagined driving by our old house and yearning to walk through that door, see and hug them so tightly.

9. Been so excited to see a friend's new baby; while I'm not totally sure even now that I want a baby at some point in my life, back then I had my mind up that I was not a baby person and motherhood would never be for me.

10. Thought I'd be this comfortable, happy, and proud of who I am and what I've become.

There are one or two other things that wouldn't have happened that did on this momentous timeline marker, but I will leave it at this and give you an update in 10 more years.