How about a little validation? It's all we want. We don't want "I love you". We don't want to relive the past. We don't even want affection. Just validation. We make our attempts to prove that we are over it. That we are over you. And, to prove that all of it wasn't for nothing. And even though we fear that you might think such attempts stem from desire and hope, we continue to make them – for it is necessary in our mind to make the present bigger than the past. It is necessary to plow over awkwardness, to stumble through uncertainty, and to dodge humiliation in order to show that we are strong, untouched, unemotional, and that you no longer matter. Because, quite frankly, you don't.
The loop hole, however, is that you think it is all for something more. You wonder if we are wanting more. If we are feeling more. Maybe you silently hope so – because if we did, that would be your sign that all of it wasn't for nothing. Our attempts signify to you a change in heart, a change in strength (weakness?) and you like feeling like the strong one, the important one, the one who on occasion just might still occupy our mind. It is that hope that prohibits your gift of validation to us. And it is that lack of validation that frustrates us, fucks with our mind, and on occasion even makes us hate you.
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